Thursday, December 8, 2011

My love/hate relationship with the experts

I recently have changed my son's diet, we are now trying to go sugar and gluten free, totally.....We are struggling with some things at school, and I am looking at a lot of different perspectives to figure out how to best help my boy.  Here's the thing though....there are so many things, opinions, expert opinions, trends.  Sometimes, I am exhausted.  Is it just me, do I lack trust in experts, am I so pretentious as to believe that I know better than everyone?  I do sometimes, do I really think I am that smart?  No I don't, but when I have different experts telling me different things, and well-meaning educators trying to help, but ignoring the substance of what I am saying, I am left standing on a precipice trying to figure out where to go and what is best for this tiny person I am responsible for.  I know this wee one better than anyone, which doesn't prevent others from having insight, but when they lack insight and I am left alone to find the answer I feel mired in information.  Is gluten free just a buzz word?  will it really help my son, or am I just torturing him?  I've seen the effects sugar has on him, they are immediate and can be disastrous, but how do I fight that in a world that shoves it in my child's face?  He has been stealing candy from a candy bowl that the teacher keeps as a reward.....of course my sweet boy tells me all about it, but I have to tell him that stealing the candy is bad....when will that lead to him no longer telling me what he does?  I want to tell him positive things.  I want to help him with the things that matter, right now that is learning to control his body, but instead I am stuck teaching him why candy is bad, which I don't even think it has to be bad, when given in moderation and not filled with artificial junk and coloring, and not at school as a reward.  This is a pointless, rambling paragraph, but it goes along with my head and my son right now.  I can't fight every battle for him, but right now I am sending him somewhere every day that is a battle for him.  He is being teased, and I am dismissed when I say that is happening.  He is left alone in the hall, and even though I know this is bad, beyond any reason, his teachers are insisting that it is the only solution and a good solution.  He doesn't trust the grown-ups there to listen to him, because they don't.  They don't listen to me, why would I believe them when they tell me they listen to my boy?  My son has some heavy stuff on his plate right now.  I just want him to be happy, to learn to love learning, to make friends.